So I pretty much suck at this blogspot thing...

I keep getting sucked back into the xanga world. :D

But I will try and keep it up on here.

So my last post .. about that..hehe..well I have a car now! So life is a little better :D

I have been going to this thing called CRU and I'm making the most amazing friends through that. And church is going amazing as well. And Arbys well that sucks as usual hehe.

but yeah...i just got really tired. lame.

so last night i was talking to someone. and i realized i need to change some things about myself before i ever expect someone to like me. liiike. working out for one. :D ever since my senior year of high school i have def gotten out of shape and that makes me super not so confident about myself. buut yeah..i think i'm starting to get a little motivation to change things.

why am i writing this so comfortably on here..cuz i know no one reads it. :D

so lately i have had this mood. the mood that i hate. the cliche saying: "in a room full of crowded people and you feel all alone."

yeah thats me lately. i don't feel like i belong anywhere right now.
i dont feel like anyone wants to be my friend.
i just dont feel welcome.

i know thats not a good feeling. and i hate it. but i dont know what to do about it.

soo yeah.

so my friend beth came to fort wayne last week. i havent seen her since ball state. it was so good to see her. i missed her a lot. and then later in the week my friend joe came. that was pretty much amazing. i have missed him sooooo much. but now that i finally see him again since ball state....he leaves and it makes me miss him so much more. it sucks. :/

so new years was good.
i'm ready for a new year.
maybe a new change.
maybe i will stick with my goals.
goals. not resolutions.
resolutions are dumb.

anywho ... i'm just rambling away.

so i think i might just end this thing.

but before i go i must post a poem that was read to us in church sunday......

Road Not Taken. Robert Frost
Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,
And sorry I could not travel both
And be one traveler, long I stood
And looked down one as far as I could
To where it bent in the undergrowth.

Then took the other, as just as fair,
And having perhaps the better claim,
Because it was grassy and wanted wear;
Though as for that the passing there
Had worn them really about the same.

And both that morning equally lay
In leaves no step had trodden black.
Oh, I kept the first for another day!
Yet knowing how way leads on to way,
I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I--
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.